From The Interesting
Narrative of the Life of Oloudah Equiano, or Gustavus Vassa, the African”
The first object which saluted my eyes when I
arrived on the coast was the sea, and a slave-ship, which was then riding at
anchor, and waiting for its cargo. These filled me with astonishment, which was
soon converted into terror, which I am yet at a loss to describe, nor the then
feelings of my mind. When I was carried on board I was immediately handled, and
tossed up, to see if I were sound, by some of the crew; and I was now persuaded
that I was got into a world of bad spirits, and that they were going to kill
me. Their complexions too differing so much from ours, their long hair, and the
language they spoke, which was very different from any
I had ever heard, united to confirm me in this belief. Indeed, such were the
horrors of my views and fears at the moment, that, if ten thousand worlds had
been my own, I would have freely parted with them all to have exchanged my
condition with that of the meanest slave in my own country. When I looked round
the ship too, and saw a large furnace of copper boiling, and a multitude of
black people of every description chained together, every one of their
countenances expressing dejection and sorrow, I no longer doubted of my fate,
and, quite overpowered with horror and anguish, I fell motionless on the deck
and fainted. When I recovered a little, I found some black people about me, who
I believed were some of those who brought me on board, and had been receiving
their pay; they talked to me in order to cheer me, but all in vain. I asked
them if we were not to be eaten by those white men with horrible looks, red
faces, and long hair? They told me I was not; and one
of the crew brought me a small portion of spirituous liquor in a wine glass;
but, being afraid of him, I would not take it out his hand. One of the blacks
therefore took it from him and gave it to me, and I took a little down my
palate, which, instead of reviving me, as they thought it would, threw me into
the greatest consternation at the strange feeling it produced, having never
tasted any such liquor before. Soon after this, the blacks who brought me on
board went off, and left me abandoned to despair. I now saw myself deprived of
all chance of returning to my native country, or even the least glimpse of hope
of gaining the shore, which I now considered as friendly: and I even wished for
my former slavery in preference to my present situation, which was filled with
horrors of every kind, still heightened by my ignorance of what I was to
undergo. I was not long suffered to indulge my grief; I was soon put down under
the decks, and there I received such a salutation in my nostrils as I had never
experienced in my life; so that with the loathsomeness of the stench, and
crying together, I became so sick and low that I was not able to eat, nor had I
the least desire to taste any thing. I now wished for the last friend, Death,
to relieve me; but soon, to my grief, two of the white men offered me eatables;
and, on refusing to eat, one of them held me fast by the hands, and laid me
across, I think, the windlass, and tied my feet, while the other flogged me
severely. I had never experienced any thing of this kind before; and although,
not being used to the water, I naturally feared that element the first time I
saw it; yet, nevertheless, could I have got over the nettings, I would have
jumped over the side, but I could not; and, besides, the crew used to watch us
very closely who were not chained down to the decks, lest we should leap into
the water; and I have seen some of these poor African prisoners most severely
cut for attempting to do so, and hourly whipped for not eating. This indeed was
often the case with myself. In a little time after,
amongst the poor chained men, I found some of my own nation, which in a small
degree gave ease to my mind. I inquired of these what
was to be done with us? they gave me to understand we
were to be carried to these white people’s country to work for them. I was then
a little revived, and thought, if it were no worse than working, my situation
was not so desperate: but still I feared I should be put to death, the white
people looked and acted, as I thought, in so savage a manner; for I had never
seen among any people such instances of brutal cruelty; and this not only shewn towards us blacks, but also to some of the whites
themselves. One white man in particular I saw, when we were permitted to be on
deck, flogged so unmercifully with a large rope near the foremast, that he died
in consequence of it; and they tossed him over the side as they would have done
a brute. This made me fear these people the more; and I expected nothing less
than to be treated in the same manner.